orange_crushed: (Default)
[personal profile] orange_crushed
Fireworks. Oh, Ten. You'll always be my Doctor. Ten/Rose, Ten II/Rose. (If I am over-cutting for spoilers, please let me know and I'll just put them up.) G, short, three moments in a life. I still don't know quite how to feel.

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE END OF TIME, PART II. Please don't read if you haven't seen it yet or don't want to be spoiled.


She hopes it is a happy one.




"Fireworks, emulating heaven,
'til there are no stars anymore."
-The Tragically Hip





It's snowing.

After midnight, and it's snowing, and Shareen and Jess have called and cancelled and Mickey isn't coming unless they turn the taps off at the pub, and very probably the rest of the evening is going to involve emptying a champagne bottle by herself and falling asleep on the sofa. Even Jackie's plans are a bit more ambitious than that.

But. Tonight she doesn't really mind. The estate is always beautiful like this, tall dark buildings softened with a dusting in white. The gentle fog of falling snow and the cheap string lights on the balconies looking cozy and warm and the quiet that comes over people, watching it come down from the higher planes of heaven. It's peaceful for the moment, and that's so rare and precious that she nearly holds her breath. Rose walks and hugs her arm and doesn't notice him standing there until he makes a noise. Such a little noise, barely a sigh. Got to be a homeless person or a drunk, a tall skinny bloke in an old coat, leaning up against the fire doors and holding his head and his stomach. She can't see his face but she can see the painful way he staggers upright.

"You alright, mate ?" Rose stops in the snow and smiles at him, whoever he is, because she's had a cocktail at Maureen's already and why the hell not ? It's the new year. A time for being kind to weirdos and strangers vomiting in dumpsters, if there ever was one.

She wishes him a happy one and he says something that she'll remember later, wrapped up in one of grandma Prentice's afghans and staring blearily at a Bond movie playing in silence on their old set. It will make her happy and sad in the same instant. She believes in the new year a little. Doesn't everyone ? The thrill of your life laying out in front of you, even if it is small and dull and full of sale flyers and off-brand cereal. But she thinks he means it, that strange man in the overcoat. She thinks he really means what he tells her.

"There you are," he says. "I bet you're going to have a really great year." He says it like there's something in his throat, and Rose is sorry for him for a moment, even in his kindness. One of those people who wants so much to leave the old year behind. She tells him she'll see him. She doesn't really know why.

Up in the flat she phones Shareen, who is more than a little gone, and wishes her a happy new year. There's the rumble of the party behind her, music throbbing like tank treads through cheap speakers, the sound of all her friends making fools of themselves in the distance. Rose hangs up. She's twisting the cord around her fingers and staring out into the dim glow in the courtyard when there's a light, a bright and sudden light that flashes brilliantly and goes out. Some kid with a sparkler, maybe, though she doesn't hear banging garbage cans or arguing or any other hallmarks of the junior-high set.

She goes out into the open hall but there's nothing, only radios behind apartment doors and faint laughter, only cold air and the thin silence of the evening stars above their heads in the sky.

"Happy new year," Rose says, to nobody in particular.





It's snowing again.

There's a great glass globe over the public gardens on Triesta, and they've set it to winter. There's ice-skating and sledding and green-skinned children building snow people and happy couples wandering in and out of the artificial trees.

"Cocoa ?" he asks, and when she nods he hands over a sweet-smelling cup with steam rising from the rim. "Light show'll be up in a second. Want to get a better seat ?"

"I'm fine here," she says. He smiles and settles on the bench beside her, drawing his coat around them both.

She sips her drink and watches the crowd pile into the low bleachers, eyes trained dutifully up at the ceiling of the dome. There's the faint sound of music and then the lights, glimmering magnificently in a hundred colors, exploding in sparkles and transforming into dragons and doves and stars. It's stunningly beautiful but for a moment Rose misses the smell of weak gunpowder and burning paper, the long slow climb of a single rocket in the dark. "Happy new year," she murmurs, against his shoulder. "Which is it again ?"

"Thirty-five-ninety-apple-Bavaria-four," he says.

"You're making that up."

"I'd never." He might. "A good year for Triesta. The civil war on Colony Five ends peacefully. They discover a cure for Thraxon's Syndrome, really a nasty thing, lots of itching, a huge relief. And Melania Surange wins the pearl cup, the first female diver ever to reach the lowest point of the sea, a huge achievement." He glances down at Rose's distant expression. "You alright ?" She nods. "What I said in London, about the storm-" he stops, and smiles apologetically. "It's nothing. There's always a storm. Storms pass." He runs a hand along her shoulder, rubs her arm and squeezes her tight. "Anyway, happy new year."

Rose watches the lights swell and fade above their heads, bright as the moon, and not for the first time she wonders.

"Doctor," she begins, "did you ever-"

"Did I ever what ?"

"Never mind," she sighs, and snuggles into his side, careful not to spill the cocoa in her cup. He rests his cheek against her hat and she closes her eyes, willing the next second, the next minute and hour and day, to move a little slower. "Not important," she says.

That night, she dreams of Roman candles and Catherine wheels, fire and starlight, the burnt end of the match.

In the morning, he takes her to London.





Half-human or not, he still can't seem to find the channel with the new year's countdown on it.

"Channel five," he insists, pointing angrily at a car commercial. "It's always channel five!"

"Channel three!" Jackie hollers, from the kitchen.

"Eight," says Tony, who has finally mastered sums. "Eight plus three is five and eight plus eight is sixteen. Can I have a biscuit ?"

Rose hands the remote to Pete and tugs the Doctor away from the television set, into the den. She tips him onto the sofa and sits beside him, petting a stray hair away from the shell of his ear.

"You're doing fine," she says, because even if he isn't, he's trying. That's all she's ever asked. They sit together in almost-silence, listening to Pete and Tony gang up on Jackie over letting them eat the rest of the cake before company arrives. There's a fire behind the grate, burning steadily, and garden lights beyond the windows. "Are you happy ?" she asks him, suddenly. She can't help herself. He looks as surprised to be asked as she is to be asking, but his eyes are warm and his smile doesn't feel forced. He wraps her fingers together with his.

"Yeah," he says.

"Where were you, last new year's ?" she asks, though she believes she might already have the answer.

"Here and there," he says. "Thought about taking a cruise, and that ended badly, so- just puttered around. Checked in on Sarah Jane, but she looked busy. I got out of town, hitched on a comet and took a ride. Just," he says, and waves a hand at the fire. "Nothing, really."

"Not Earth ?"

"No," he says, idly. "Bellaris or Cellaris, I forget. They have terrific gelato." He rambles on about the forty flavors and insists that he'll find the recipe and now, finally, she understands. The pained voice and the face in the shadows.

They go to bed long after they should, after Tony and Jackie and Pete have stumbled off and the guests have retreated to their cars or the spare room, long past the time when the drinks have gone warm and the coffee cold. He falls asleep almost instantly and Rose lies awake beside him with wet eyes, one hand pressed against his stomach, listening to his steady breathing. She is grateful.

"There you are," she whispers. Here, alive, in the new year.

She hopes it is a happy one.

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 10:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tardis-stowaway.livejournal.com
*happy sigh* That was perfect. I especially loved the last few lines of the middle section, full of memory and ominous portent alike.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Memory and ominous portent, that's Who in a nutshell sometimes. Ha. Glad you liked this. :)

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 10:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ophelia-winters.livejournal.com
I keep ramming my palms into my eyes to stop myself from getting misty-eyed! Fantastic! I loved all three of them, but the last one is just...perfect. Exactly what I needed after that episode!

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Aw, honey! Sorry for the mistyness. I hope the ending cheered you up a little. :)

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 10:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cake-of-hate.livejournal.com
This is so pretty - I wish we'd seen something like the last bit on screen. /sigh

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you! I tend to always want more Rose, but if it has to just be in my head, that's ok too. Hee.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] cake-of-hate.livejournal.com - Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:40 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com - Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:55 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 10:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] devohoneybee.livejournal.com
It's perfect, and fills one of the 2 holes in the story for me after watching it last night. The hole of, "why didn't Rose remember, later, how he looked?" (The other is the identity of the mysterious Time Lady). Beautifully done, thank you.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
You are so welcome, thank you for reading! And I understood they tried to do the "staying in the shadows" thing, but Rose is very clever and observant, I couldn't resist playing with that.

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 10:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] earlgreytea68.livejournal.com
Awww, it's beautiful.

"She believes in the new year a little. Doesn't everyone ? The thrill of your life laying out in front of you, even if it is small and dull and full of sale flyers and off-brand cereal."

This is *gorgeous.* People tell you your life will change, and you never believe it. But oh, how sometimes you want to. I just love the thought process behind this tiny moment lingering with her.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you so.

And I think Rose really is one of those people who believes in change, who grabs at the chance to expand her worldview and grow. You get the feeling she'd really appreciate celebrating the new year.

Date: Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 11:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] asahifirsa.livejournal.com
Actually I hope she doesn't remember. Just reading your fic made me cry. I think it'd be better if she didn't... thanks for writing it though.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
I am sorry for the tears. <3 You may be right- better that she believes he's off with Donna, adventuring!

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 12:00 am (UTC)
ext_23543: (Default)
From: [identity profile] starlightmoonla.livejournal.com
This is beautiful. Lovely look at these new years with the Doctor and Rose.

Great job!

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you! I couldn't help myself, just seeing Rose again was like LOVE ROSE MUST WRITE MORE ROSE.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 12:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sunnytyler001.livejournal.com
Awww!!! Lovely!

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you darling!

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 12:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glorious-clio.livejournal.com
Oh, you always know exactly the way to put things. <3

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Aww. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I just love Rose, I was so happy to see her again.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 03:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] countrygirl-914.livejournal.com
*wibble*

I just finished watching part two (thank you, BBC America, as I am home for the holidays and have only crappy dial-up). I didn't cry, but I have this deep feeling of sadness, and this made it worse, but at the same time added some warm fuzziness, so I think it kind of balances out? I don't know. But either way, this is beautiful, as always.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Warm fuzziness is a good thing. :D Thanks for your kind words, as always.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 04:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nuit-belle.livejournal.com
Oh, Rose. This was exactly what I needed after the finale.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
ROOOSE. I am just stupid for her. Seeing her again, I couldn't resist writing something about them.

Hope it helped. :)

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 05:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ant3ka.livejournal.com
Oh, this was much needed after that finale. Beautiful snapshots. Thank you.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
If it helped at all, I'm so glad! Thank you.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aimeekitty.livejournal.com
thankyou darling! I came here directly after finishing watching it.

still not sure what to think..., but thankyou.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
I still have no idea what to think! It was so big and now it's over and Rooooooose and Donna and TENNNN oh my God. (This was all I could manage yesterday for like the whole day.)

<3

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thunderemerald.livejournal.com
Fuck you.

Fuck ME.

I love this.

All of it.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
I'm not gonna lie, my best friend and I bawled like babies when we saw Rose. It was like "THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING, OH GOD."

(And, I think this was the reaction I wanted, lol.)

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] thunderemerald.livejournal.com - Date: Monday, January 4th, 2010 12:28 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:39 am (UTC)
verdant_fire: (dw: always all right)
From: [personal profile] verdant_fire
She believes in the new year a little. Doesn't everyone?

"There you are," she whispers. Here, alive, in the new year.

She hopes it is a happy one.


Oh, I was hoping you would. The ending of this made me tear up again, much like the last 20 minutes of the episode. I love that Rose suspects, even while Ten is with her. You did a lovely job writing the scene in the episode from Rose's POV. It's hard to describe, but she feels younger the way you wrote her. Beautiful job. *smiles through the tears*

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Rose is so wonderful, and Billie Piper did a fantastic job of bringing her back as we remember her- kind and warm and curious, so full of potential. It was a lovely moment and I couldn't resist it.

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 08:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] claidissa.livejournal.com
OH. WELL FINE.

I'm going to start crying again soon and it's entirely your fault for writing this beautiful ficlet and I just think you should know that, so.

THIS!:

He looks as surprised to be asked as she is to be asking, but his eyes are warm and his smile doesn't feel forced. He wraps her fingers together with his.

I love how you write Ten and Rose and you probably know that, but almost more importantly I totally love how you write Ten II, because I like being assured that him and Rose are doing alright and you do that and it's wonderful. Also, thank you for calling him Ten II and not Handy or Clone or any of those other names.

This is fantastic. Thanks so much for writing it. ♥

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
I'M SORRY, I KNOW. Seeing Rose again, and she is the last person he sees and talks to, and Donna in a wedding dress and Ten not wanting to gooooooo *weeps*

I really love Ten II, and he and Rose deserve their happiness. I admit I had my issues with JE, but the most important thing is them, together, living their life day after day, the big damn adventure of the Doctor and Rose. :D

Thank you so.

Thank you

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 01:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nantonos.livejournal.com
For taking that moment out, treating it as it deserves, writing it far better than RTD did *and* addressing the consequences.

And happy new year.

Re: Thank you

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 06:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Oh, you are so welcome- thank you for reading it and saying such kind things.

And happy new year to you, too! :D

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 10:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-spin.livejournal.com
TEARS ON MY FACE. Honestly, that moment in the episode was the thing that really made me feel, that echo of how bright and sunny they were together. It just glowed with affection, ugh, and then this multiplies the feeling by about one hundred thousand. I have chills. Like, the throwaway that Sarah Jane looked busy so he went and hung out on a comet is heartbreaking enough, but the endingggggggggggg. I hope it's a happy one, too. Overwhelmed by the love in my heart: farewell, my darlings.

<3

Date: Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 11:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Overwhelmed by the love in my heart: farewell, my darlings.

God, when I think about that it is not just Ten who is leaving, but likely all of them, Jackie and Rose and Martha and Mickey and Donna and Wilf and WHYYYYYYYYY-

-I just can't.

So yeah, I felt like you did. Those last moments were so full of life and friendship and adventure, all the things they had together. I may cry again. Argh. So thank you.

Re: <3

From: [identity profile] the-spin.livejournal.com - Date: Tuesday, January 5th, 2010 02:42 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: Monday, January 4th, 2010 04:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] k-puff.livejournal.com
I am such an idiot for Rose, it is not even funny. I will never have enough of her, never never. She's so open and willing to accept change, but at the same time she is so good at keeping the important things always in her life. I just ADORE her character, I'm sad we won't be seeing more of her. T_T

I loved this line, too: "She tells him she'll see him. She doesn't really know why." As soon as I saw that in the episode, I immediately thought, oh, that's the Bad Wolf in her. Just a little bit of that omniscient gut instinct she's got. ^_^

Date: Monday, January 4th, 2010 12:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
I'm right there with you. Rose has really been my major link to Who- I love the Doctor, always will, loved Donna and Mickey and Martha and Jackie and Pete and Jack, but Rose's good heart and sense of humor and love of adventure made it real for me.

And Rose has such good instincts- "the domestic approach," lol. XD

Date: Monday, January 4th, 2010 04:34 pm (UTC)
ext_10182: Anzo-Berrega Desert (Default)
From: [identity profile] rashaka.livejournal.com
I'm seeing your name everywhere, all of a sudden! Alice/Hatter fic, then macros recced on my flist, and now here!

...making me cry. again.


Anyway, keep writing in fandoms I love, and I'll keep reading with anticipation! =D



Date: Wednesday, January 6th, 2010 01:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you! I hope I won't disappoint you. :D

Date: Thursday, January 7th, 2010 10:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kirinin.livejournal.com
You gave me the ending I really wanted to see.

Well, okay, so what I *really* would have wanted is more Rose in canon, but I appreciate her in all her forms. ;) I'm with the others, here: she made the story real, breathed life into it.

Thanks for writing!

...now I will go weep.

-K

Date: Thursday, January 14th, 2010 01:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you so. *beams*

Oh please don't weep! Rose is going to have a really, really great year. ♥

Date: Friday, January 8th, 2010 03:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iblamebroadway.livejournal.com
I stumbled across your journal a few days ago and have slowly been making my way through all the Doctor Who fic you've written, and, um, Damn. I've cried and laughed and flailed a lot, because yours is some the best fic I've ever read.

This one in particular KILLED ME. AUGH. During the episode itself I kept it together pretty well, and as soon as Rose was on the screen, I started BAWLING. And I thought I was over it, but you've of course gone and proved me wrong because this made me cry actual tears which never happens. So, pretty much, thank you for being amazing--this was just what I needed after that episode.

Date: Thursday, January 14th, 2010 01:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
How lovely! Thanks for this. I hope you're enjoying the fic, you've certainly put a smile on my face. :)

Date: Sunday, February 14th, 2010 02:56 pm (UTC)
ext_266522: (Default)
From: [identity profile] neptune47.livejournal.com
T_T and you can also write serious fic so well!

This fic felt quite cathartic--the Doctor's final farewell to Rose broke my heart quite a bit--not only because she had no idea of the importance of those few minutes, but also because the Doctor and Rose never really got a proper goodbye. So to have her understand the significance of that moment as well was very poignant.

Date: Thursday, February 18th, 2010 01:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orange-crushed.livejournal.com
Thank you!

I was a total wreck when I wrote this, full disclosure. The goodbye/hello/happy new year to Rose was like AHHHHHH WHY but in a good, hurty, timey-wimey way.

Rose figures a lot of things out on her own. ;)

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